Daughters Who Walk This Path Review

Daughters Who Walk This Path

25 year period of the book 1982-2007

This novel is a parallel story of Morayo and her aunty, Morenike. The novel beautifully tells a tale of sisterhood and the shared experiences between Morayo and Morenike. The novel is about the similar stories of two women and how they experienced deep pain caused by loved ones. Their stories are familiar in the sense that a lot of african women have similar stories. Reading the novel was a cycle of being happy, heartbroken and angry.

Morayo - Morayo is the character whose story begins the novel as she is the main protagonist. We are introduced to Morayo as a young girl growing up in Ibadan whose younger sister, Eniayo, is just born. Morayo and Eniayo develop a strong bond as sisters growing up and throughout their adulthood. Morayo is fiercely protective of her sister and a loving daughter to her parents. At 15, Morayo is raped by her cousin, Bros T. At first she doesn’t share this with anyone because Bros T threatens to rape Eniayo as well, and of course Morayo would never let such a thing happen to her younger sister. Eventually, Morayo blurts out that Bros T has been raping her at the dinner and her parents take Bros T back to his mom’s house. Her parents do not speak with her on the experience and how they can move on from it; instead, they enroll Eniayo in boarding school which deeply hurts Morayo. While in the university Morayo becomes “the campus slut”. Morayo goes from an innocent young girl who had a cute relationship in secondary school to a rape victim to a campus slut.This is a part of the story that doesn’t sit well with me because I understand Morayo going from innocent to a woman shaped with fear, shame and anxiety but I do not understand the evolution into a campus slut as it seemed a bit stereotypical. A young girl gets raped and then acts out by becoming sexually promiscuous. Morayo’s relationship with her aunty Morenike saves her life, literally. Morenike walked into the house when Morayo first attempted suicide. Morenike was also raped as a teenager so she’s able to draw from that experience and provide strength, comfort, understanding and love as Morayo navigates the experience of her assault. The novel ends with Morayo marrying her high school boyfriend and finding her “happy ending”.

Morenike - Morenike is Morayo’s aunty, who we find out actually suffered the same trauma that Morayo did. As Kilanko takes us through Morenike’s life experiences, we read about the details of Morenike’s childhood, assault, and the journey to recovery. This raises a somewhat suprising perspective on sexual assault, especially for that time period and setting. While her father’s reaction was unfortunately unsurprising, her mother’s response was much needed. As soon as she found out about Chief Komolafe raping her daughter, she did not blame her. Instead she confronted him without hesitation and hold him accountable for what he did to her 15-year-old daughter. The comfort and protection that Morenike received from her mother (Mama Ibeji) and grandmother likely played an instrumental role in her ability to do the same for Morayo. She showed that despite life’s turbulent events, her resilience and strength allowed her to emerge from the ashes. After Morayo’s attempted suicide, Morenike and Morayo built a sisterhood that one could say saved Morayo’s life.

Eniayo - Eniayo is Morayo’s younger sister. The novel starts with Eniayo’s birth in Ibadan. Eniayo is an albino (‘afin’) girl who is mocked for her skin color but she has tough skin and grows into a young woman who loves herself and deeply loves her sister. Eniayo’s character development is satisfactory but not as much as expected. Eniayo’s birth was a major event in the family so it seemed Eniayo would be a character that we would deeply engage with, but that was not the case. Eniayo was the younger who Morayo protected and her parents sent away to boarding school after Morayo was raped. It seems as if Eniayo had no idea that Morayo was raped but then as adults we see Eniayo apologize to her sister for not saying anything or rather not understanding what she saw or what was going on.

Bros T - Bros T is Morayo and Eniayo’s older cousin. Bros T’s mother is Bisoye’s sister. Bros T is a troublesome teenage boy who comes to live with Morayo’s family so that Morayo’s dad would have influence over him to straighten up his rebellious behavior. Bros T is pampered and spoilt by his mom since he is her only child. One can say that Bros T’s upbringing played a part in his callous behavior. Bros T moving into their home is welcomed because he’s always been the fun older cousin to Morayo and Eniayo. However Bros T rapes Morayo and is eventually put out. We don’t hear anything about Bros T for years until he’s a billionaire mogul who coincidentally becomes an important client at the bank Morayo works at. Bros T in fact, requests that Morayo be one of the bankers in charge of his accounts. When Morayo and her boss go to Bros T’s house to drop off account documents, Bros T apologizes to Morayo about raping her all those years ago but not in a way that seems genuine. At that time, Morenike is terminally ill and requires expensive treatment. Bros T offers to pay for her cancer treatment abroad as some sort of apology to Morayo. Bros T’s apology doesn’t seem genuine because he intrudes in Morayo’s space without taking care to make sure he is welcome or even truly figure out how best to make amends without triggering Morayo. He assumes an apology, money and potential boost in her banking career would make up for Morayo having lived with trauma for years. And that’s indicative of how abusers can be passive and ignorant of the depth of pain they’ve caused their victims.

Bisoye (Morayo’s mom) - Simply put, Bisoye’s silence was deafening. I can imagine the guilt she must have felt, having insisted that Bros T come stay with them despite his troublesome past. However, it was no excuse for the way Morayo’s assault was handled. She prioritized her own guilt and discomfort, at the expense of Morayo’s pain and almost her life. This was a very important perspective to highlight because it is far too common in the African community. While it is clear that Bisoye was deeply upset by Bros T’s actions, her lack of action was really crippling considering that enablers are almost as dangerous as the abusers. In contrast with Mama Ibeji’s response, Bisoye’s response (or lack thereof) definitely made Morayo’s road to healing that much more daunting.

Kachi - When Kachi was introduced into the story, it seemed like any other story of a childhood crush meant to pull on our nostalgic heart strings. But when he reemerged into the story, it was definitely a pleasant surprise. It was heart-warming to see Morayo get her happy ending with her childhood love despite her tumultuous childhood and recovery from it.

Our Thoughts:

Overall, we loved this book! It vividly captured the painful aftermath of sexual abuse and the journey to healing. Both Morayo and Morenike “walk this path,” which allows them to build a beautiful sisterhood that saves Morayo’s life. The story was authentic, and beautifully told. The only thing that we had reservations on was the evolution of Morayo and her mother’s relationship, which seemed to only improved after Morayo got married. However, this is probably representative of the typical mother-daughter relationship in a Nigerian household, where marriage is deemed a major accomplishment for young women. It was just a bit heartbreaking to see that despite everything Morayo had been through, it took her marriage to really get the love and approval that was long overdue. Other than that, it was an amazing story that showed that even when one walks this painful path, there is power in sisterhood and supporting other women.

Favorite Quotes:

“We do not abandon the business of living life just because of what people will say about us.”

“To say that I fell into this love suggests a series of coincidences or just pure luck that takes away from the responsibility of my choice. For if our days are long or our nights bleak, when life springs unpleasant surprises along our way, I will remember that loving you was my choice. I will remember that love is much more than intense feelings. For feelings can be fickle and change so swiftly just in the course of one day. Know this then, my love. Know that this choice to forever link my life with yours was mine alone to make. With eyes wide open and clear, in the presence of God, our families, and our friends, I choose to spend the rest of my life with you and with you alone.”

“My dear, please remember to be kind to yourself. I know we both tend to be so hard on ourselves. One thing I am sure of is that you will need that kindness in the many days and years that are still to come for you”

"No one told us that evil is found much closer to home, and that those who want to harm us can have the most soothing and familiar of voices."

Discussion Questions: *adapted from The Reader’s Guide*

To you, what is “the path” that these daughters walk?

Despite similar experiences of underserved abuse, the responses from Morenike and Morayo’s families are very different. What do you think was the reason for that?

After reading about Morenike’s experience, (how) did your perspective on Morayo’s situation change?

How did Morayo and her mother’s relationship change over the course of the book? Why did Bisoye respond the way that she did, and how did this impact the family moving forward?

What was your response to Bros T’s acts of “repentance?” Did it seem like he was truly regretful or was he just exerting his power over Morayo again?

Do you see any similarities between Nigerians’ attitudes towards governmental politics and their views on sexual politics?